In case you thought I had ascended and was no longer
Ha! ha! Right.
So many changes and things to deal with... I just have not felt like writing. I'll begin with the following which was written over a month ago, but still applies.
Lately I spend a lot of time playing computer games, especially through Facebook, where you can create many different kinds of worlds. I say I will only play for an hour, and then find 8 hours have gone by (or more).I have felt uninterested in doing much else. It seems that every time I try to 'do' something in the 'real' world, it fails or does not get off the ground, yet I am a 'millionaire' in these games. True, I am still sad over the death of my cat Grace, worried over my finances, and still recovering from the ankle I broke in May. I have been allowing myself to just while away the time, sensing that this just a phase and it will pass.
At first, I was concerned about myself. Was I totally losing it? Wasting so much time, accomplishing nothing. But I saw that most people 'waste' a lot of time. That in fact, ultimately, almost everything we do is a waste of time. What 'real' value is there in 'work'? I thought about this a lot. The only thing I found to be of value is helping others. But then, even that turns out to be useless to some extent. It just seems better because it appears to be self-less.
I really started looking at other people's lives and saw that most people have a certain amount of leisure time which they waste in front of a T.V. or some such dulling activity.
Even though I live in the country, there is a state highway that goes out to the ocean next to my property. I can see it from where I sit playing my games. Every morning and evening the 'rush hour' as they go to and from work. On Friday and Sunday nights a steady stream of campers, RVs and motorcycles as they go to 'have fun'. Yet what is the purpose and meaning of all this activity? Make enough money to live and to have fun on your free time. All that driving back and forth. While I am totally content right here, neither coming nor going - just being here.
I saw that millions of people all over the world play these games and that one can 'communicate' with people this way. You give each other gifts of all kinds and there is sense of community. It is amazing how I have begun to feel affection for these strangers based on the 'hearts' they send or the consistency with which they attend to their virtual farms.
Then one night it occurred to me that in fact, creating and living in the virtual worlds of games is preparation for living in a non-material reality.
There is a lot written about the power of the creative imagination. All that humans have created, began in their minds. Every invention began as a thought and thus on the energetic level. It is also said that the level of existence will be totally on the level of energy. Perhaps these virtual worlds are parallel realities, like our dream world. Learning to work within these virtual worlds may be like mastering lucid dreaming. Perhaps there is a 'bleed through effect'.
I will say this, after years of wishing for a particular change in my herbal products business, I literally got my wish one night. At the moment it happened, it felt like I had just hit the 'Enter' button on a newly created universe. I had been thinking about something I wanted to occur in my company and one night 'out of the blue' I got just what I wanted.
I realized I had imagined it for 2 years. And I had decided that I would not 'look' for the opportunity. That for me to know it was the right thing to do, someone had to ask me rather than me trying to sell it to them. And it happened.
In fact, the only things that 'work' these days are things that I do not seek myself. They are all gifts from the Universe. Whatever I try to initiate myself, fails or has to be recalled.
I was all set to go to the Resonance Project training with Nassim Haramein this weekend in Joshua Tree. I was really looking forward to it, but my financial situation got so bad that I had to cancel. I am quite disappointed.
It was a year ago (over Halloween weekend) that I went to the Shift by the Bay 2012 Conference in San Francisco and my whole life changed.
Now I am teaching Mayan Hieroglyphs, the Calendar and 2012... Spring semester 2010 in two locations... Santa Rosa Junior College and Delta College in Stockton.
I have continued reading every book I can find on 2012 no matter how strange, so I can see what others are thinking about it. I am also getting deeper into my own research.
I am studying glyphs related to portals.
I discovered an incredible book, that was published in 1991, but had never heard of before. From the Mouth of the Dark Cave is a study of ritual use of caves and the associated iconography. Caves are considered portals to the Underworld. The gods are born from and live in caves. The author has shown how rituals depicted on stelae actually took place in caves.